dog
Monday! He goes Monday for his surgery! Say goodbye to your balls, buddy! Your humping days are soon over! Hopefully, I will be able to walk barefoot again on my newly tiled floors!
I love this puppy dog with all my heart, folks! But, as we all know, he will be a happier pet once we get rid of those pesky nuts! (By the way, my other two pets, a dog and a cat, are both “fixed” - been so for years and have been the most enjoyable of pets!)
While surfing around for info on dog neutering, I ran across the following poetry - I hope you get as big a kick out of them as I did:
Used to play dead or sit
Used to roll right over
Used to bring you lots of joy
Used to go by “Rover”
Used to let you pet me all day
Underneath the wheeping willow
Used to eat your table scraps
Used to be your pillow
Used to be your chick magnet
Used to respond to your calls
Used to fetch your frisbee
USED TO HAVE BALLS!
I coulda been somethn’
Eye-a the tiger, a Contender!
But now… I am nothing
Cause you let ‘em remap my gender
There was this dame before I was sniff’n out
Mona lisa of all the bitches
But she ain’t got it for me no more
Cause she’s seen me with these stitches
Oh great! and your lovely cat
For her it’s Fancy Feast
Now I smell like Betadine
And she smells like tuna-n-yeast
what’s so great about her, I can do lot’s-a stuff
She’s just a dumb cat
took off like a bottle rocket after scratching you to ribbons
While I played dead and sat
Rolled over, fetched, and humped your leg
Made it with honors through doggy school
Best Friend Status two years straight
numerous beatings for misplacing stools,
Yet I always come running wagging my tail
To your “Here Pup! Here Puppy!” calls
No, I just don’t understand why, you cold cruel person
You let them take my balls!
Both poems above written by Eye-a the tiger, a Contender!
But now… I am nothing
Cause you let ‘em remap my gender
There was this dame before I was sniff’n out
Mona lisa of all the bitches
But she ain’t got it for me no more
Cause she’s seen me with these stitches
Oh great! and your lovely cat
For her it’s Fancy Feast
Now I smell like Betadine
And she smells like tuna-n-yeast
what’s so great about her, I can do lot’s-a stuff
She’s just a dumb cat
took off like a bottle rocket after scratching you to ribbons
While I played dead and sat
Rolled over, fetched, and humped your leg
Made it with honors through doggy school
Best Friend Status two years straight
numerous beatings for misplacing stools,
Yet I always come running wagging my tail
To your “Here Pup! Here Puppy!” calls
No, I just don’t understand why, you cold cruel person
You let them take my balls!
- Steve Brim
